I spend a lot of time on frivolous activities – mainly social media. Later I feel bad that I wasn’t “productive” enough. I waste time because subconsciously, I want to avoid studying that techno bullshit. I do not think it is worth spending time on. But, I am not strong enough to take a decision saying “No, I will not spend my time doing that techno bullcrap unless necessary”. I instead am always stuck in this lingo of should I, shouldn’t I and end up just escaping that situation by taking my mind off of it and into the world of brightly coloured buttons and screens.
My end goal currently, is to earn money, to be self-sufficient. Instead of spending time making sure I get there, I am spending my time mindlessly sitting in front of books I don’t care about or useless information I can probably learn when needed. I need to be more direct. If I want to earn money, get a job or be as ready for it as possible. If I’m lonely, I need to try talking to people, going to places where I can meet new ones.
A peek into my head 